I Hate You. Merry Christmas.

I leave you this Christmas with these thoughts to hold. I have a split personality, I am a curmudgeon who pretty much is annoyed by everyone and hates people as a whole, and also I love children and people as individuals.

I hate you
I love you, I hate you. But you – specifically – I love you.

When I look at you, I am almost always trying to see what you looked like as a child; looking for remnants of that innocence and sweetness in your face. I am seeking out the baby your mother was so happy to hold as you came into her world. Politician, friend, enemy, gangster, client, judge, you are all the same to me and I am always speaking to your inner child when I talk. You remember, the kid who is always saying “That’s not fair” and trying to even everything out. The child who would protest “How would you like it if that was done to you?” Lately I have been hearing “Share, you have to share!” I somehow got hung up on the religion ideal of having faith and believing like a child.

Kissing Santa
Everyone deserves love

I think it is important to recognize that kids are complex beings who are assembling their world views. When I am speaking with someone who doesn’t share my point of view, I am appealing to the inner 7 year old who is still open to weighing the evidence against instinct and their heart to see if I can change their mind or behavior. So yes, I am trying to manipulate you at your core.

Last week my youngest and I had a conversation about God. I like Science, it is fun and it makes order out of the chaos of everything. I believe in Science – I also hold a steadfast faith in God. Darla wanted to know if God was a girl or a boy, and what God looks like. I said I did not think God’s gender could be defined as male or female, but since boys wrote the Bible she would hear God is a dude. When it came down to what God looks like:

  • The man standing on the freeway exit.
  • The lady sleeping under the overpass.
  • The gentlemen in suits at 7th and Wilshire drinking coffee
  • The kid who sits next to her at circle time –

If we believe that god made us each in His own image, then we all look like God.

We are all made out of stardust and defied the odds just by being born.

There is no purpose or greater good from treating each other as less than equals. I hate that we separate ourselves into arbitrary groupings and assign power accordingly.

So when you see someone who is hungry, homeless, impoverished or simply unhappy – look at them hard, find their inner child, or look for a little bit of God in them.  I am hoping you will find it harder to hit them, ignore them, bomb them or wish them harm – instead you will find it easier to love them and show them compassion and wish them peace.

“Mary Did You Know, When You Kiss Your Baby Boy You Kiss the Face of God.”- Mary did you know

“I was a poor boy too” – Little Drummer Boy

Published by Homeless

Mommy. Social worker. Nice lady seeking to end homelessness and end poverty. FightOn

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