“I know ow you gave me the paper in July, but when I didn’t return it to you… uh … I expected you would notice and send me another form. I kept waiting for you to call and tell me how you were going to fix the problem.”
- The problem is that clearly this beautiful, polite, sweet kind and loving young woman had a NICE mother.
A mother who finished her homework for her
A mother that didn’t give her chores.
A mother who did her laundry and put it away
A mother who was so concerned about providing a gentle and ideal childhood that she missed some of the important items. The not so pleasant items.
Hardship. Hard work. Self reliance. Challenge. Understanding of power roles and responsibilities.
Teaching that can suck because it isn’t a lot of fun.
No one wants to be MEAN and when your kid doesn’t automatically ace these lessons and you have to be harsher and really make sure the message gets across…well, you can feel like an ass.
But… When you give up or skip these super important skills and lessons, you have set your child up to fail.
There are many reasons people end in poverty. Sometimes it really is as simple as the person was not equipped to navigate life as an adult and be responsible for themself.
As I just told a sweet, granola crunching, homeopathic, all natural mom friend… sometimes you have to be MEAN to do the job well.
My oldest is just now starting to feel the importance of my guilt and reluctance to be MEAN because I wanted her her to her to like me.